forgotten_aria

Last week I went skating at a rink with a friend I hadn't seen in a while. I had skated once during the winter, but only for a few minutes, so this was the most skating I had done in a long time. I was shaky at first and then something clicked and I got 70% of my skating skill back. I couldn't do hockey stops or crossovers, but I felt confident going fast.

Today I went with another friend rock climbing for the first time in over a decade, possibly two. I got to use my improved knees a bit. Don't have a lot of grip strength though. It felt really good to flex that muscle memory again and see the progress I made just from my first climb to my last. It was a bunch of fun, even if I didn't have the endurance to make it to the top. Metrorock in Everett is really nice (especially compared to mill City, which had it's own appeal.)

Then I took my first tumbling class at Esh. It was some basics, but also things I need to work on. Plow is super uncomfortable in a larger body, but I'll get by. I feel pretty good after it and I know 3 years ago I would have felt beaten up by it.

I also seem to have a circus community doppelganger because people keep thinking I seem familiar, but we can't figure out where they might have met me.

Cyr wheel!

I looked around a bunch of places for a cyr wheel. Phil never replied to my email. Most of the US made ones were ~$800-1000. The Canadian manufacturer was just as extensive. I was almost ready to order an aluminum one from Poland when the Ukrainian guy made a social media post about his new design of an LED aerial cube and posted pictures. I took that as confirmation that not only was he still being able to work, but he was being able to innovate. I thought it was worth taking a chance and making an order with him. Also, I'm sure Ukrainian businesses, even the ones not in the war zone, are hurting right now because of the chaos.

It took less than a month for him to make it (they are made to your height+4") and ship it. Etsy had the wrong tracking service and by the time I got the right number from the maker, it had passed through customs with no issue and I didn't have to pay any unexpected tariff on it. I decided on clear PVC so the stainless steel could show through, and I'm so happy with it. It seems really well made and he even labeled which joiner goes with which joint, sent extra screws and the right alan wrench.

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I love it so much, but it's daunting to know I'll be mostly learning alone. I figure there is a ton of stuff I can work on, like spins, waltz, manipulations, and just getting a feel for the mechanics of it. If/when I get decent enough at that, I'll either seek out a private lesson for some of the more risky stuff, or try to get into an esh class for a session.

I got some discount vinyl flooring, the kind that comes on a 12ft long roll, to put it on my driveway so I don't wear out the PVC too quickly. This seems to mostly work. Once I get better control, I likely can practice indoors during the winter.

I'm having my big purchase anxiety. I'm betting on myself to stay focused on this enough to get good. I think there is a good chance I will, but I do know I lose focus on things when the next shiny comes along. I think it's also especially triggering my anxiety because the aerial rig is only a few months old and I've only used it a few times (partly because of weather.) I figure once I get my waltz, I will have a nice solid go-to to keep me at it.

That being said, I know enough circus people I might find a seller if I do lose interest.

I made a new IG for my lyra, cyr, hammock, etc. since my main IG is about variety. [Bad username or site: flying @ aria] I'm not perfectly happy with the name, but it was most important to get the account up and running than find the perfect name. Any suggestions?

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Lyra isn't going well. I think she expected me to have more upper body strength by now and she keeps hanging the hoops too high for me to get in. Really not what I needed when there is a stress I can't talk about right now adding into the stress that everyone else has.

Found out that if I miss a night of sleep, I will sometimes have to skip crossfit just due to clumsiness. Luckily I didn't find this out the hard way.

I'll be driving to Pittsburgh soon and it's making me very nervous to be away from home when who knows how much will be shut down.

I really want to take circus classes and I was excited to try North Shore Pole, but looking at their schedule, I either have to get up earlier than I would enjoy long term or I have to miss TKD sparring class, so right now I'm at a loss. Once I'm past intro, then I can do lyra on Monday night, but knowing me, passing out of intro will take a long time.

I keep wondering if I should go back to "just need a class that makes you sweat" woman, but every time I think about that, it makes me annoyed, so I really don't think I need that frustration in me life.

I'm not quite back to crossfit 100% and I think that I shouldn't skip sparring until after the black belt testing (I am not testing, but am learning to evaluate sparring.)

So not really sure what I'll end up doing.

I went back to crossfit for upper body day and it was much better. I think I'm signing up and they'll make an allowance for me because I want to avoid leg day and I don't really want to do Tuesdays and Thursdays (they alternate days.)

I had wanted to sign up for a silks class, but the person said the class was full but tonight the aerial silks person phoned me and said I could take a trial class and see if my knee would cause me problems. It didn't, but I couldn't get the basic climbing or foot lock down. The other students were having no problems with any of the skills. I really liked the things I could do, so after I asked her how much of a problem it was that I couldn't do the basics. She said most people have trouble, but they condition as they go. Now, I will admit I brought it up, but I said something to the effect of "I'm worried my weight will make it harder for me." Meaning that I would have to gain more strength because of my weight. But she said in response, "have you tried aerobics? You just need a class that makes you sweat." No, a class that makes me sweat is not the easy answer. That's not how it works! I am so tired of naturally thin people thinking being a normal weight is easy. I started crying, told her my weight was complicated, I'd lost weight in the past, but always gained it back and more. I told her I would come back when I was stronger, but I'm not sure I can go back. I feel embarrassed, dismissed and repugnant.

EDIT: and it took away from the things I did do, like hanging upside down and doing situps.