forgotten_aria: (chun li kick)
TL;DR: I passed, technically.

I had only tested the sprint on the beach with 100m measured by my stride length and my nephew counting, but I got 18s which was close to my approximation.

The 1.5 mile, he said I got 17:20, which isn't that much different from what I do with hills, so the hills didn't matter that much. I'm so glad I trained as hard as I did. I hate to adjust my pace the whole time to make sure I passed.

The sit ups went better than expected, but I was confident I could pass. The push ups went as well as expected. The standing long jump took me 4-5 tries, but I was fairly sure I could get a good one. The chalk made all the difference on the bar hang.

The modified flip flops are so much easier than the standard ones. He needs to up the number.

I didn't pass the shuttle runs (did about 14.5 I think,) but he let me and 2 others do the alternative that was made for bad knees, which I easily passed. This is the where I technically passed. I'm going to try to make it a personal goal to legit pass the shuttle runs before December.

For the curious, the requirements to pass the test was (for adult women):
100m sprint: 21s
1.5 mile: 18m
push ups: 30 in 1 minute
sit ups: 35 in 1 minute
hang from a bar: 30s
standing long jump: 5ft
flip-flop: 13 in 1 minute
10m (technically 11m) shuttle runs: 15 in 2 minutes
alt to shuttle run was dojang laps: 9 in 2 minutes

EDIT: the rest is just hard work and isn't pass/fail, so I'm not afraid of the rest.
forgotten_aria: (chun li kick)
I recently fell in love with liberty puzzle's 100% whimsy all wooden puzzles, but new the puzzles are ~$100. In particular the one that I both liked the image and the cut was $125 + shipping. So I bought one used off ebay. Because it was an ebay auction I counted all the piece. 535 when the box and the website said 545. I emailed the company to make sure there wasn't a type they knew about. They said, no, 545, and that I had liked been ripped off. They can replace one or two missing pieces (for a fee since it was used) but not 10. I emailed the ebay seller to make sure they hadn't found any missing pieces. He was friendly and helpful and assured me it was complete when I sent it. I said I would do the puzzle and make sure. It took G and me a few days, and I was trying to enjoy it, but there was the worry hovering over it.

I would have enjoyed it more if I'm not also coming up against the deadline for my Halloween costume. So I spent most of the last few days doing a lot of sewing and a lot of puzzle doing.

And tomorrow is the black belt physical, which there is one event I'm not sure I can pass. The rest I think I can with a few tries.

I will do a longer post about making the costume soon.
forgotten_aria: (casio sb)
I wasn't quite up for Honk but I really wanted to do it, so I forced myself and I'm glad I did. I think a found the right balance between fun, relaxed enjoyment and social. I had one good musician moment too, though in general I felt like such a poser. I'm happy SoH is so accepting of any level of proficiency so at no point did I feel like I was letting SoH down.

I've been struggling again with the "I'm not good at anything" going into this weekend, which likely why it hit hard.

I did get pushed to the front of the stage by the final set, but by that time I was comfortable enough with the song that I could "perform" and that was super fun. I was a bit worried at our HUGE band bouncing in rhythm on the stage, but luckily it could take us.

I'm tired and sore, but it was so worth it.
forgotten_aria: (susuwatari stars)
We tried a new Korean restaurant today. it was quite nice, but they said something to us we've never heard before. They said we ate too fast. At first he said, "we're open until 9pm, you didn't have to rush" then the woman said something about how it was unhealthy to eat so fast! (Her English wasn't that good.

Mostly we found this funny.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I got roped into teaching a taiko workshop tonight.

I had so much fun. I miss taiko. It's one of those cases where I really really loved it, but it just doesn't work any more. :( My shoulder already hates me just form the one night, and it's not the only reason.
forgotten_aria: (felicia sleep)
I jogged 20 minutes without stopping today. It was a wicked slow pace, but the point was to do it. I still don't like running, but it's getting easier to get my self out the door. On hot days, I'm preferring the slower pace, longer run. I'm hoping as things cool down and can work more towards speed.

There are now 8 weeks left before testing. I'm still not sure I'll pass. To complicate things I'm having trouble with shuttle runs too. The turns wear me out, especially because I can only "hockey stop" about 6 before my knees start complaining at me. I have to do 15 in 2 minutes. I can do about 14 now. I get really tired at 6. It doesn't seem to matter what pace I go because it's the acceleration and deceleration that tire me.

The good news is that the application (and application fee) due date is AFTER the physical, so I can delay until after I know if I've passed to hand over my money. I will be very disappointed if I have to wait another year, but in the end, I don't NEED a black belt. This was never about the carrot, but I've been programmed to want the carrot for too long to not have it affect me.

In other news, I had a bad interaction with one of the students and let the master know about it. Not only was his reaction perfect, but did a great job of caring not only for the other student, but for my personal reaction as well. I am SO GLAD I searched and finally found this place.
forgotten_aria: (chun li kick)
I practiced power breaking for the second time tonight. The first time I did only two boards, just to assure myself it wouldn't be super hard for me. Today I tried 5, broke 4 the first time, then broke 3 and then decided to stop because my knuckle got bruised.



One of the black belts was practicing 6, then tried 7, only broke two, decided to stop, so I bought the boards from her and after a technique adjustment, broke all 5. Yay! I can do it! (5 is 100% for the test.) Now if I get to practice again, I can try 6 and see.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I wouldn't mind a new cell phone. The only problem is I like small cell phones. The one I'm currently using is 4.91in x 2.41in. I also don't like apple and google screwed me over on the both nexuses, so I don't want to deal with the pixel either. I use t-mobile, so I'd need an unlock phone, most likely. This doesn't leave me with a lot of options that I've found. I'd like Android 5.0 or better, I think. I'd like a better antenna too, but it's hard to search for that.

Does anyone have a newer small phone they love that is android but not google?
forgotten_aria: (Cree Dance)
On Friday my world of warcraft account will lapse for the first time since November 2004, shortly after this post. a little over 12 years of playing the same video game. I had already started to fatigue, only logging into to do the group content, and then my group fell apart. I'm trying to figure out if there's anything I really want to do before my account stops. And really, I might like to poke at the chromie stuff, but I'm just super bored with WoW, which is understandable.

A few years back they sent statues to anyone who had had an account, continuously, since launch, so I'm putting myself out of the running for the 20th anniversary statue. ;)

This is unlikely to give me any more free time to play other things, since Overwatch is already taking up more video game time than I would really like in my life. I've been putting off making music and other things because of various other priorities. I'm hoping I can find a good balance soon.

Due to a personality conflict, I have to pull more out of taiko again. That's also feeling like a good thing. Hopefully when the dust settles I can make an effort to do the "hard" things of making music videos and putting myself out there again.

I also haven't been to School of Honk since January and miss that (and some of the fun gigs, like the Georges island gig.)
forgotten_aria: (felicia sleep)
I still hate running.

That being said, I don't hate myself while doing it, which is a large improvement.

I'm on week four of c25k, which is 3 minutes run, rest, 5 minute run. I started this week being not sure if I should repeat week 3 again, or try week 4. I'm glad I tried week 4, since I was barely able to do it. The problem, however, is that from this point on in the program the runs start being 20-21 minutes and I'm getting a distance of ~1.6 miles while doing it. Since my goal is not a 5k, but rather 1.5 in 18, I decided today to do a variation. My original plan was 6m run 90s rest 6m run, 90m rest 3m run. But while I was out I changed it to 6m, 90s, 4.5m, 90s 4.5m. I couldn't make the last 4.5m run so it ended up being 4m, 30s, 1.5+ enough to finish the 1.5 miles.

Doing this I got 12:01 mile, which is a good first goal towards the 1.5 in 18. I finished the 1.5 in 18:32 with an average pace of 12:21, which is a huge improvement. I think this is the most important thing. I'm finally seeing progress and things don't seem so hopeless. I'm still a long way off from being able to do the time and do it every time, but at least I no longer feel I'm sliding backwards.

I plan on doing week 4 a few more times, and doing my modified program until I can do it completely. Then I will think about what to do next.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I got two copyright claims on some of my Overwatch streams. Now, Blizzard lets people monetize game play. They have a fairly clear page on that. The claiming company is something called SBS and has no claim on the content.

However, I didn't dispute the claim, I just deleted the videos because all a dispute does is sent it to the claiming company. Youtube says they don't review claims. You can also have your account closed if you have copyright disputes against it. As far as I can tell there's nothing to stop this company from just willy-nilly making claims and they get complete power to field disputes.

I can understand not reviewing EVERY dispute, but it just feels like youtube is abandoning content creators.

EDIT: I decided to file a dispute. I prefer streaming on youtube. Let's hope this doesn't bite me in the ass.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
There is a thing I want. It was on sale for $160. It's currently available for $200. I still think it is worth $200, but 1) I feel annoyed that I was out of town for the sale, or I would have jumped on it 2) the store1 has bought up most of the competition years ago (but pretends it didn't) and in so doing has made a notable degradation in deals. 3) they have a "rewards club" where, in their FAQ, they explain they will gleefully sell your information.

Now I still want the thing, but I am so far not getting the thing because I'm just plain annoyed and mistrustful of the store (not that I haven't bought many things from there in the past.) Am I just being silly?

As far as I can't tell no one else sells the thing. It's on amazon and ebay, but it's being sold by one of the branches of the store.

1 guitar center bought musician's friend, music123, Lyons Music, woodwinds and brass, Giardinelli and a few other sites, but still pretends they are different.

EDIT: People have started to review it and the package is missing two things in the photo without any indication that they are not included. I'm glad I didn't get it.

Chain saw

Jun. 21st, 2017 02:22 pm
forgotten_aria: (vacuum)
I've never even used a chainsaw before today. We had a large branch fall from a tree during the storm and a hand saw just wasn't going to cut it. I bought the 40v battery powered ryobi. I waffled a little on getting the 18v, because then I could use the batteries in my other tools. I think I'm glad I got the 40v, because it had some other features as well and it cut super smoothly. Only draw back is only have one battery, so once it's spent, it is a 90 minute wait for a recharge.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I cherish those friends where I don't have to worry what I say is stupid enough that they'll stop liking me. I have a handful of such friends, and for someone who suffers with replaying social situations over and over, their presence is some of the few places I can relax and be happy.

I don't know if I'm getting worse at social interactions, or it just feels worse because I've been hiding from them such that I know life can be anxiety free in my little house-cave.

FB has definitely made me feel like there are certain subjects that I just need to avoid, even in real life. I'm really tired of trying to be a good, open minded person, but still ending up feeling like the bad guy. I hope I am not actually the bad guy (and please, if I am, someone I trust tell me.)

I do need to remind myself that if I don't open my mouth, I can't say something stupid.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I just found out that most new dedicated GPS devices require a smart phone to do traffic updates... what are they thinking? If you have a smart phone with data, why would you fork over ~$100 for a dedicated devices when you could just use your smartphone?

So this means if I ever want to "upgrade" my current GPS, I will have to buy used... sigh.

Update

May. 26th, 2017 11:52 pm
forgotten_aria: (casio sb)
I just payed for another 2 years of TKD with no reservations.

I'm doing Winchester Town Day again. A friend basically invites people to come practice performing. She asked me what other instruments I have to perform on (last year I did harp and hand pan) but to be honest I don't have that many solo performance level instruments. What I am doing is I'm playing a flute piece which was an audition piece for honor's band in middle school. It's been a lot of fun to revisit it after becoming a much more mature musician. I am playing handpan again, because well, anything sounds pretty good on that. Lastly I'm doing a cover of "Come together" using my harp as a bass (I tried to learn it on bass, but couldn't get it clean enough) and using my new looper pedal to let me program in some drums and things. I'm still a little shaky on it (memorizing the lyrics to that song is a pain, since they're borderline nonsense) but it is starting to sound decent.

That is barring the fact that I've had a cough for a few weeks, so my voice sounds super crackly.

running

May. 2nd, 2017 02:09 pm
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I'm still struggling with the psychology of running. Running longer but slower doesn't seem like an accomplishment to me. It's not helping that running just seems to come so easily for most people who I talk to, especially those with long legs.

My C25k program also wanted me to pay for week 3, so I have to find a new app.
forgotten_aria: (felicia sleep)
I took [personal profile] dcltdw's advice and ran a lot slower and a little longer. The self-hatred was much less. It still wasn't fun, but I am kind of neutral about myself right now, which given history is a big win. The good news is I kept my sub 12 minute mile pace for half a mile without stopping to walk. I know that's only a 1/3 of the goal, but it still felt encouraging that I my "slow" pace was the pace I need to maintain.

Sadly the data on the GPS watch seems to be corrupted, so now I can't trust what it said, so who knows. maybe I didn't. I claims I did a 13:15 overall pace over 2 miles and my first mile was 12:27. Given that I was focusing on not making myself miserable, that's not so bad.

The bottom line is I did the running and it hasn't triggered full mental health issues and that's a qualified good.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
I feel like I've made a lot of progress in my mental health, and then a week like this comes along and I feel like I have no resilience against stress. What is different is I can kind of feel the stress consuming or chipping away at what mental stability I have. Some how this makes it a little easier to cope with (but not much.) I do wish I understood how I might fight against the connection. It's really not that much stress too. I asked my therapist how I might build strength, so I'll try to work on what she suggested.

I will still enjoy that there are more good days than bad, but I don't like the idea that it's only because I am avoiding stress and that any time my life gets busy (or blows up) I'll be back to where I was.
forgotten_aria: (Default)
Ran again with the shoes with better socks and using the last holes. They were better than before, but I can't say they're really a win. Definitely not worth the money, but I also feel like they're not so horrible that I can justify returning them now that I've run outside with them. So chock it down to an expensive mistake. I think I'll alternate between these and the on and then when I can justify it, try the sturdier On shoes.

P.S. I wish running didn't leave me feeling like a failure.

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