A party without the birthday

[forgotten_aria]

So my birthday is sometime in the next 6 months and I've been thinking this year I really want to have a party. The problem is most years I don't want to have a party or really anyone to notice or care, so I'm a little protective of the date of the actual birthday. So I'm curious if there is some way I can have a party that would still attract people as if it were my brithday without it actually giving away the date, or do I loose because I'm overly protective of the date? Or am I being stupid and should just stop hiding the date?

Comments

[coraline]

i don't really understand why you're protective of the date, so i'm not sure i can comment usefully, but i think a "everything but the birthday" party would work (i.e. cake and singing of "a very merry unbirthday") and would probably attract people, but you'd have to explain in the invite why you were doing this and i don't know if that would defeat the point for you.

Re:

[forgotten-aria.livejournal.com]

Explaining wouldn't hurt stuff for me, I just think that people might be less likely to show up. I don't know.

I'm protective of the date because I don't like people saying happy birthday to me. I don't like people making a big deal out of something that is esentially "congradulations for continuing to exist." Usually this is true. This year it's not though. I think because I'm happy to celebrate me for once. I think normally it just makes me feel inadiquate.

Re:

[coraline]

again, i don't really understand the motivation about the birthday thing here, but i understand these things are important.

i think if the invite says "i don't do birthday parties, so this is an everything-but-the-birthday party. please celebrate my unbirthday!" people will be likely to treat it with the same importance as a birthday party.

or at least i will :)

[exponentialdk.livejournal.com]

I think you should get right to the point, and announce a Happy Cat Day party, celebrating another year of us all being happy to have Cat. Some people might confused that with a feline-themed party, but you could combine that, too, if you wanted.
:-)

[chanson.livejournal.com]

It's a party! It's a chance to hang out with you! Why would people be less likely to show up just because it's a not-birthday party?

Re:

[forgotten-aria.livejournal.com]

My parties have had very low turn outs over the past 2 years. (~10 people.)

Re:

[forgotten-aria.livejournal.com]

Including last years attempt at a secret b-day party.

[katybeth]

1) Some friends out here have held Birthday parties that were in honor of everyone attending who "has had, or will have had, a birthday" that year. Interesting, anyway.

2) If you just want to be protective of the date, you could have a birthday party on any arbitrary day and say "I'm celebrating my birthday, which is sometime in the next 6 months." You may get the Happy Birthdays and such at the party, but probably not outside it since people wouldn't have a date.

[tcb.livejournal.com]

*hug*

I think letting people know the date, and also giving any caveats that make you feel comfortable (re:wishes, gifts, etc) is perfectly acceptable.. but I expect it would help people to know if they can make it or avoiding scheduling other things if they know the date..

Re:

[forgotten-aria.livejournal.com]

Why do I need to let people know the date of my birthday to have them reserve time for the party? B-day parties almost never land on the actual B-day.

Also, I expect most years I don't want to have a party, so I don't wany my friends to make that gap in their schedule.

[katybeth]

*nod* I don't see any reason people need to know the date of your birthday. They do, however, need to know the date of your party. :)

[testing4l.livejournal.com]

I don't blame you. I hate telling people when my bday is. Less so this year because of relsqui.

I think the in-the-general-area-of-a-birthday party is a fantastic idea for those like us.

[plymouth.livejournal.com]

One year in high school I held my birthday party 6 months after my actual birthday. Because I wanted to take people canoeing but the canoe rental places aren't open on my birthday. and then summer came and my friends were all busy with summer camp and family vacations and there was no time to hold a party when they were all free. So it happened in october. I never hid the date of my real birthday though. Just saying I have no problem whatsoever with birthday parties that don't fall on or near birthdays.