CrossFit open

I've been avoiding competition, because in general it just reminds me how much I don't stack up and really I need to focus on me vs me, but my CrossFit gym has this whole big theme night, and lights and music, and just kind of a party, so I figured, ok.

The first workout (22.1) I went alone in my "heat" and last (because snow had pushed it to Saturday morning and I wasn't going to get up any earlier than I had to. There are three levels and I did the middle one. I did what I usually did, but for whatever reason everyone thought I did amazing. Even the coach gave me a bonus point for my "performance." I will say it was huge that I had every eye in the house watching me workout and it didn't phase me at all.

The second workout I decided to do level 2 again because I thought it would be better to focus on sustaining a level of keeping moving, not have to worry about tripping over the barbell, and I had to go to TKD afterwards, so I thought while I could do 155lb dead lifts in a workout, it might be not wise. All in all, 22.2 was "ok," except that I rolled my ankle on the last jump because I was rushing (I did the level where stepping over was ok, but I jumped because it was the end.) The ankle healed fairly quickly, thank goodness. My camera caught the moment and it was worse to look at than it felt.

22.3 was announced and everyone was commenting on how hard it was. I ended up doing the lowest level and I didn't even complete all the movements. It was exactly the reason I didn't like the compete. For other people, competition brings out the best in them. The coaches, who cultivate optimism, encouraged people to get their first pull up or alike. But I'm fighting hard to do all the things I do all the time. (Not saying I push 100% all the time, since that would be unhealthy.) I am rarely surprised at my ability to do something and more often shocked in a bad way when something I thought I could do, I couldn't. I was humbled and I honestly need the opposite of humility when it comes to physical things.

It was frustrating because the lowest level was supposed to be "accessible" to more people, I feel like they failed at that. Sure make Rx and scaled hard, but leave fundamentals in a place where people who could do the first two workouts didn't feel like they had to skip the last one.

I also really hate how the open is scored. If you work hard at a workout for 12 full minutes at level 2, you are scored below someone who did one rep of one movement of the top level. I likely could have done the workouts at Rx level and gotten 2-31 reps, ~42 reps, and done 22.3 scaled (2nd level) at 84 reps and scored much much higher than I did.

I was 108,567/115,291 (of "women" who entered at least one score) and 8014/8828 of "women 45-49."

Will I do it again? Not sure. Maybe if the gym gets a kick back from the entry fee, but otherwise, I think it's still not healthy for me to compete.

knees!

In other news I decided since my knees are SO MUCH BETTER from when I last saw a PT, that I would go see the PT for my now very distinct lunge knee pain. She couldn't find much, other than my knee cap seems to not like moving to the inside. She suggested my quad was tight too. So she gave me some manual knee cap stretching and suggested quad and hammy stretches before workouts. I've also, on my own, been doing single leg strengthening and it's made a big difference already.

She then got a new job closer to Somerville and couldn't see me any more, but that's fine. I just wanted to make sure there was nothing big I could be doing to work on my knees.

Both PTs I saw were awesome, really listened to me, and not once made me feel like my knees were my fault for being fat.

I still need to get a new PCP and optometrist. I'm also considering getting a gynecologist to help me navigate pre-menopause.

I'm still having my arms fall asleep while sleeping and it seems likely it's something pinched in my neck. Stretching my neck and shoulders before bed helps slightly.

TKD schedule changed and I get to go back to lyra class. Though now it's being taught 100% by the teacher who never puts the hoop low enough for me, so I have to fight to get into it. I can't wait until I can do a chopper mount so she can have both hoops high.