Social anxiety

[forgotten_aria]

I cherish those friends where I don't have to worry what I say is stupid enough that they'll stop liking me. I have a handful of such friends, and for someone who suffers with replaying social situations over and over, their presence is some of the few places I can relax and be happy.

I don't know if I'm getting worse at social interactions, or it just feels worse because I've been hiding from them such that I know life can be anxiety free in my little house-cave.

FB has definitely made me feel like there are certain subjects that I just need to avoid, even in real life. I'm really tired of trying to be a good, open minded person, but still ending up feeling like the bad guy. I hope I am not actually the bad guy (and please, if I am, someone I trust tell me.)

I do need to remind myself that if I don't open my mouth, I can't say something stupid.

Comments

[desireearmfeldt]

I'm not on FB but I get the impression it can be a pretty socially stressful place to be sometimes... :(

I hope you feel like you can trust your friends (even those of us who are not so much in touch these days) to give you the benefit of the doubt, and also not to think you say stupid things in the first place. That's certainly never been my impression of you. :)

[katybeth]

Love.

[kelkyag]

I hear you. The thought of speaking up in public is often daunting.

I think we all say foolish things sometimes, and the general atmosphere currently in many places is very unforgiving. This is ... problematic doesn't even begin to cover it. I hope/aspire to do better -- especially among friends.

Opting never to speak up is a path you can take, but not one I encourage.

[sauergeek]

I dropped off FB — deleted everything I'd posted, deleted all my likes, and then deleted my account — for several reasons, but one of the lesser ones was the stress.

However, before that, I'd managed to offend at least two people into unfriending me. One, so far as I can tell, by me being a liberal who wouldn't keep quiet; the other by being insulting to the Confederacy. My first reaction was surprise. Next was "don't let the door hit you on the way out".

Stupid is often a matter of perception. When the brouhaha about the Confederate flag was going on, I had a number of people posting stuff in favor of the flag. I'd call them on their garbage. I do not think that me doing so was saying something stupid, but one of them did to the point of unfriending me.