forgotten_aria: (harp)
A friend of mine found me a low pressure solo harp gig so I could practice playing a solo performance. It went ok, better than I feared (which isn't to say I didn't mess up, but I did so without completely choking and making things worse with panic. We played taiko after my set, and it's always amazing just to see how taiko blows people away. There is something about taiko that really speaks to people in a way most other music I perform in doesn't.

video )
forgotten_aria: (nicki window)
Recently my TKD master asked me what my physical goals were. I don't want to have physical goals. I want to take each step forward as best I can. Physical goals for me just lead to disappointment. He even talked about him visualizing succeeding to succeed, but after being disappointed that I shouldn't get my black belt this year, I kind of feel like having goals rather than directions* for me continues to be a bad idea. Visualizing that did jack. I almost feel like winners can visualize because they are winners, not that they are winners because they visualize.

I have been wondering if he was thinking I would say something about a weight goal. But losing weight, while would be really wonderful for many many reasons, cannot be a goal for me. I know what it takes for me to lose weight and I know that if I do, i just rebound and gain it all back. I know that it makes me feel horrible and cranky. I know that I am burnt out on counting calories. I need to make changes in my life that I can in theory make permanent and being at a significant calorie deficit is not something I can sustain.

I've been wondering if it's worth me sitting down with him and chatting with him about it, possibly with some choice research in hand.

* By this I mean a goal is "run 1.5 miles in 18 minutes" where as a direction is "run more regularly so you get in better shape and improve your running stamina."

Completely unrelated, here is a quick handpan video. )
forgotten_aria: (nicki window)
So for my birthmonth I was going to finally get, after years of wanting one, a handpan. While I was looking, I bid on I really really liked, and then the guy removed the auction. Then I found out there is a company who will be making electronic handpans, which I thought "that's silly, but look at all these ways it is better than a real handpan. Then I was sad, such an expensive instrument that can only play in one key and thought, "I shouldn't get one."

And then my favorite affordable handpan maker on ebay posted this handpan. And I decided I could likely resell it for as much or more than I bid, so I bid, thinking I knew his reserve was less than my bid. Except it wasn't.

So a plywood crate arrived today with a handpan in it. So now I own a handpan! The musical instrument addiction continues.

It came on a somewhat bad depression day, so I'm fighting with myself, knowing full well part of why I buy new instruments is I'm trying to feel special and wanted, deep down.

Part of it is it's harder to play than I expected. The tongue drum I have is some what easier to hit the notes.

I uploaded video on my youtube channel, but I'm not that thrilled with it, so I won't post it here.
forgotten_aria: (casio sb)
Taekwondo is still awesome, though I might get a little stuck on this belt because my shoulder doesn't like the front falling technique. Surprisingly, however, my shoulder is doing better with it than I thought, so instead of testing by falling from my knees (which my Master was going to be fine with if it seemed like my shoulder wasn't going to be ok with it any time soon) I have told him I want to learn to do it right and catch myself falling from standing. It's progressing more quickly than I thought, but I also need to be super careful, since if I do it wrong, I might hurt myself and set things back further.

For my birthmonth (which is next month) I decided to finally splurge and bid on a handpan. I got really really enamored with this one handpan, bid on it, and then the guy took down the auction. Then I went through a strange thought process. I found out there was a kick starter for an electric hand pan. Half the cost and you could program it to be in many different keys and even a few different voices. I thought "that's silly, but those are good points about handpans" and so I came to the sad conclusion that I shouldn't spend that much on such a constrained instrument, even though I've wanted one for years and years.

And then my favorite handpan person had an auction that didn't sell, and he reposted it. And I was worried that I would change my mind and regret, which also seemed silly. But some how I rationalized that I could likely resell the thing for more than my budget. So I bid (less than my budget was when I bid on the auction that got taken down) and surprisingly won. I wish I were as excited as I would have been a year ago, but given that I'm not sure if I convinced myself of something I shouldn't have done... well, well see. It is supposed to arrive 22nd. Hopefully the weather won't knock it out of tune. It has three extra bottom dings, which I'm not sure how you are intended to play them (though I know that's not unique.)

Maybe if I love it, it will be weird enough I can get hired as background music.

EDIT: I'm getting a little bit of excitement now. "Holy cow! I'm going to own a handpan!"

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